As many of you may or may not know, I’m quite on The Gram (Instagram) quite. So I see a lot of things down my TL – everything from shout-outs, games, and regrams. You name it. More often than lately I’ve been seeing so many posts of half naked females. If I see another, I’m going to SCREAM! So, I was inspired to write a little on self-esteem.
Self-esteem: n : A respect for or favorable impression of oneself; self-respect.
I felt the need to put the definition up because we often times like to think of self-esteem and self-respect as being two separate things. No, they are the same.
Just as a check point: This post is specifically for my ladies who are reading. Not to discount my guys, I promise that I have something for you guys soon.
Any who… Recall my last post in which I discussed who we must love ourselves. Remember? Great. Now let’s take it a step further. I have some ladies that do not love what they see in the mirror, and apparently there are those who love themselves too much.
“What do you mean by that Tiana?” I’m glad you asked.
By loving yourself too much, I mean those of us who feel the need to show our goodies on social networks or walk around half-naked. Some of us may think it’s sexy, and some of us may think boys like it. Well, let me shed a piece of knowledge upon you. It’s not cute at all. Yes, boys like it, but boys do not respect it. MEN, more specifically GENTLEMEN, do not want women that advertise themselves to the world.
Let me break this down a little further…
Ladies, by letting everything show, posting half naked pictures and not actually putting clothes on, you tell an awful lot about yourself. Here’s the list as it follows:
1) You do not truly respect yourself.
-If you respected yourself, you would keep yourself covered up. A woman who respects her body cherishes and understands the importance of leaving things to the imagination. You may think highly of yourself, but you have to reciprocate and also respect yourself as well.
2) You are asking for attention; the wrong kind of attention
-By showing your body, a gentleman will not chase you. Nine times out of ten, you will end up with a dog. Hint: If a dog is always chasing after their own tail, why would they pass up yours? A gentleman like mystery and will not want a woman that everyone else can see.
3) You will tolerate being treated as less than a lady
-To men, they will treat you how you present yourself. If you present yourself as a lady they will treat you as such. If you present yourself as trash, no matter how cute you are or what you have going for you, they will treat you as trash!
My point I would like to place on the table is that the ladies in my generation need to do better, we have to do better! I see so many girls complaining about how guys don’t respect them, yet they don’t respect themselves! Trust me, if you present yourself correctly, then a guy will approach you correctly AND treat you correctly.
Not all guys are dogs, yet all guys are not gentlemen either. You must present yourself as a lady but also demand it as well. Now, I am not saying be stuck up, that is not the key. If a guy does not love you for your smile and your brains, but only loves your body, that is the wrong one. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. He needs to go. Now, a gentleman, will appreciate you because of the simple fact that you present yourself as a lady and demand to be treated as such. They want somebody that knows their worth and knows how to present themselves and act accordingly (that is a topic for another day).
Ladies, my plea is that you take what I said and just think about it. Don’t present yourself as a lady because I asked you to, but do it because you RESPECT and LOVE yourself just that much.
I love you all! Xo.
“Perhaps the surest test of an individual’s integrity is his refusal to do or say anything that would damage his self-respect.”
– Thomas S. Monson